Never has a film caused so much
of a stir as Josh Trank’s “offering” Fantastic Four. Rocked by controversy and
even Twitter updates from the director before release, this film had everything
going against it. Stan Lee doesn’t cameo in it and even the trailers looked
lack lustre. My blog, as you may have read, celebrates all things geeky,
movies, music and more. I should have been excited for this, I should have been
chomping at the bit just like I was for Avengers: Age of Ultron. But you know
what? I was quite happy to pass it by.
However, I didn’t and watched the
movie – and I’m sorely disappointed.
Josh Trank had a great run with
the ever-so-popular Chronicle – so he knows how to make a good movie. Although
Chronicle was a decent enough movie (not that I particularly thought it was the
best myself), his credentials suggest he was capable of stepping up and making
a mark with a superhero movie in the mainstream. I was excited at first, but
then saw what he wanted to do. He changed the race of Johnny Storm and was starting
to make other changes too. I questioned the casting – yes, Kate Mara is a very
pretty girl – but was unsure of her Sue Storm. Aside from the whole Human Torch
debate, Jamie Bell cast as Ben Grimm/The Thing was another issue for me. I have
nothing against Jamie Bell as an actor – and he even hails from the same town
as me - but I didn’t think he was the best choice for the role. Miles Teller –
who puts in good performances in Divergent and Whiplash was cast as Mr
Fantastic too – but again, he wouldn’t be my choice for Reed Richards. However,
I have been wrong before – I wasn’t happy with the casting of Daniel Craig as
James Bond and Chris Evans as Captain America at the start
So onto Fantastic Four. The
runtime is around 1 hour and 30 minutes and this is disconcerting for a reboot.
I’m not sure how much stuff you can get into a movie that length – especially
if it’s not an animation or kids movie. However what I experienced was that,
yeah, you can’t get much into it.
Fantastic Four is a reboot of
Marvel’s First Family and the truth is – it was my first exposure to Marvel
and comics I had followed by Spiderman. I have a soft spot for them and I
appreciated the previous movies even though they are generally described as
bad. However, this movie takes us back to the days when they were not sure
about superhero movies and not the awesome blockbusters we are used to now.
WARNING: SPOILERS AHEAD
The movie starts with a young
Reed Richards in school saying he will do great things at the ridicule of
others. Fast forward a few years later (7 actually) and he’s at a Science Fayre
where he is selling his wares and inexplicably Franklyn Storm and his adopted
daughter, Susan, give Richards a chance to make his idea a reality. Teaming up
with Victor Von Doom (who is stereotypically goateed and grumpy) and Sue they set
to work on his idea. Meanwhile Johnny Storm is doing a Fast & Furious
racing and when he prangs his dad’s car he is kind of grounded and gets forced
to work on the project by his dad with the others. After a montage of working
lots and about 30 minutes of run time (or more) Ben Grimm gets a phone call to
ask if he fancies popping by to have a go at this new device they reckon can
get them to another dimension called Planet Zero. Ben, of course, thinks this
is an awesome idea and turns up and off they go. Disaster ensues when they
visit - they get some powers and leave Doom behind as they think he’s bought
the farm. They return a bit injured and, we now at around 50 mins into the film
they are tested upon by the government.
Right now we are nearly two thirds
through the film and really nothing much has happened. The last 30 minutes is
condensed into – oh Dooms alive let’s bring him home, I’m home now I want to go
back, let’s go back and fight, the end.
END OF SPOILER
Considering the movie is 1 hour
and 30 minutes and it takes nearly 2/3rds of that to get going, this is a
massive opportunity wasted for Marvel’s First Family. The characters are bland
and uninteresting – it’s as if the writer is thinking “we all know who they are
…let’s just get on with it” and then hasn’t a clue what to do with them. Sue
Storm spends most of the movie rapping computers and when she does get powers
spends most of her time holding her breath and flying around in force bubbles.
The Thing doesn’t even have blue eyes (another change which I was not happy
about), is completely naked (for the love of Mike, why!?) and spends most of
his Thing state begging Reed Richards to help him. Reed himself is a flimsy
geek stereotype and not the strong leader we know and love in the comics – he
even naffs off for some of the movie and leaves the others behind. No real role
stands out except for Reg E. Cathey’s Franklyn Storm who has the deepest voice
known to man and comes out with some nice thought provoking statements.
It’s hard to say what exactly
went wrong with Fantastic Four without mentioning – well pretty much
everything. The casting was suspect, the story makes no sense at all (complete
with major plot holes) and the changes the director opted for just doesn’t
work. It might have been a decent movie if it wasn’t the Fantastic Four and a
bit more of an awareness with continuity and sense but as a Fantastic Four
movie it’s just terrible. I’ve never seen such an awful adaption since 1996’s
The Avengers (which was based on the 60’s spy series of the same name). The
movie is confusing and slow and it’s a massive wasted opportunity. I would love
to see what Marvel would do with this franchise if they had control of it – and
I’m sure it would be awesome, but as it stands it’s really, really bad.
POPSCORE: 4/10
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